Link Creative Problem Solver
by KaRath
Summary: Some humour and comedy regarding on how Link dealt with certain issues when travelling through Hyrule, especially when wounded or in need of money!


**Creative problem-solving**

"Welcome to Hyrule Academy," Link roared, as he viewed the hopeless muppets that Hyrule expected to call soldiers after their training. Link's eyes swept across the parade grounding, looking for any signs of weaknesses. He found none, and was immensly proud. Thus assured, he begun his speech.

"You will not become mindless soldiers, like previous ones that made sure the kingdom got overthrown." He turned away from the podium, walking towards the soldiers, addressing them as a colleague, a fellow warrior, not as a superior.

"You will become creative soldiers who make sure the job at hand gets done, WHATEVER the cost!"

The trainees looked at each other once, then snapped back to attention when Link pulled up his first presentation.

"Firstly, I will teach you survival, the ways of the land. The first presentation I will make will ensure you that whenever you are injured, you will be able to survive, no matter what the odds are..."

1. REST = HEALTH REGENERATION

Link peered carefully around the corner, ensuring that the position was clear... to suddenly see an object shooting towards his head.

He ducked back, mentally cursing the archer as his foe prepared another arrow.

He was wounded badly, dammit. He needed life hearts immediately - but his foes wouldn't drop any. And now, pinned down by an archer, who was probably coming to cheerfully take his head and add another notch to his kills.

But Link was resourceful and attentive to detail, and quickly found a chair sitting in the corner of the room. Beautiful! A chair. He'll go take a quick break, regain some life hearts, then take down the hobgoblin archer that was threatening to breathe down his back.

So he dropped into the chair, chilling out for a while, regaining his health slowly, and when the archer came around the corner, it was needless to say that the hobgoblin got just desserts from the Hero of Hyrule.

2. POTIONS = TIME STOPPAGE

Hey you! Injured? Tired? Stressed? You'll definitely feel rejuvenated with our magical Red Potion! Brewed from a recipe passed down through generations, not only does the Red Potion recover six (6) hearts of health, BUT IT WILL STOP TIME. That's right folks, the magical Red Potion is SOOOOO magical that it will stop time!

Up against a monster that's sending an arrow at your face, or a boss with a big nasty claw to KO you and make you restart from your previous save? No worries, with the Red Potion equipped, you'll be able to freeze time and save yourself from the inevitable death you would otherwise face!*

*Please note that Magical Potion Company (C) does not take responsibility for errors in usage of the potion that ends in the death of the user, and having the user backtrack 3 hours because they didn't SAVE.

3. CHEATING = GOOD

The Treasure Chest Alley Game (C) was having a great boom in it's life. Hyrule Market had never been more prosperous, and as a result the owner was rolling in the rupees.

Until that little fairy kid walked in. Then, trouble started.

It didn't matter, every single time the kid entered he never picked a fake treasure chest. He ALWAYS chose the one with the key... until the very end.

At this rate, he'd be completely drained out. The man sobbed. His shop would be closed down as he couldn't afford to repay the mortgage, he could lose his home and... his wife!

... Ever since that little fairy kid entered into his life!

Link went towards the local bank and stored the three hundred rupees he earnt from shaking down the Treasure Alley Game store. Yeah sure, it wasn't really nice, but come on, he needed to save some money up for his future (and his 403k).

Hmm, three thousand rupees in his bank account, not bad. Maybe he'll go troll the miscellaneous insect purchaser... after all, the bugs he caught always seemed to duplicate, after all...

The trainees slightly tilted their heads towards one another, gave each other a look of "are you kidding me? Is he serious?" and rotated their heads back to attention as Link came out of reminiscing mode. Ahh, was it good to think about the old days, bar the painful Deku Baba's who liked to take your head off with their teeth, stupid fire bats who would burn your Deku Shield, and the so-many-time twists that would have made a ten year old kid have his head inverted inside out.

Seriously? Have you ever TRIED explaining quantum physics, let alone try to understand them at the raw age of 10? (Ten, seventeen, doesn't really matter Link thought. It's not like he ever tested out whether his language became more sophisticated after he "turned" seventeen.)

"Anyway men, the point being, sometimes when you want to make an egg, you have to break an omelette. Or something like that," Link said, breaking out of his little internalisation.

Once again, the trainees internally groaned. Was the Queen of Hyrule serious that this guy was an extremely lethal warrior who saved the world?

#FIN#

A/N: Thank you for everyone for reading to the very end of this fic. I have a very strange of humour, but I can say this - all of the above are true (resting on a chair DOES recover hearts in Skyward Sword, surprisingly enough, as far as I remember drinking potions just stops time cold, and... well, who didn't use the Lens of Truth + replicate and sell bugs for 50/ea in Ocarina of Time?) from what I've observed. One could imagine Link hoarding rupees, hahaha XD

Anyway, if you dropped a review, that would be much appreciated. I'm not sure if this will be updated - if so, would be more "humorous" one-shots, similar to this. Thank you!


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